Misfit !!

Sometimes i feel that i am a complete misfit in the society. What ever I do, what ever I become will never be completely understood. I have a bad habit of assuming that people would think of me in a good way as I never intentionally do any harm to any one. But it breaks my heart when on occasions I feel that people actually don't like me much, they misjudge me or mistrust me. I think it is very hard for people like me to be happy. I tend to live inside my own head and when interact with people it seems they have taken me to be a person I am not at all. Oh you don't understand the dilemma of a person who is misunderstood! the agony of doubting your self in the struggle to understand whether you are right about yourself or whether people figured you out. What is to be done for sorry souls like me! where should we go? what should we do? who should we trust enough to let our guard down. Sometimes it feels like all is fine and sundry, everything becomes clear but then suddenly you loose the grip of things and doubt your own being.
Oh the tragedy of people happening around you. what can be more wrong for us to have social ties , what can be right for us to have social ties. I never had any favorite thing or personality or song or food etc. the reason is that i never knew what i want, I still don't know that. I have always envied people who knew what they are looking for; money  love, fame etc. but me i have always been vague, always struggling, always trying to keep up. Dear Life what have you done to me, how will I survive you and why will I survive you. when will it end, when will I be off guard and free. Sometimes I feel there is no place for me!